Top 10 actual reasons for Bush's recent colonoscopy.

As you know, Overlord Bush recently gave his presidential powers over to Chancellor Cheney while he was under sedation for his colonoscopy.

After some careful and painstaking research, I believe I've come up with a few reasons for why he had a colonoscopy at such a critical time.

1. Those WMD's have to be in there somewhere, right?

2. It gives Cheney the option of starting a world war with no effect on Bush's image.

3. Ha! Bush can't testify before an investigative commitee if he's sedated, can he? Take that, congress!

4. The mission was to retrieve the stick, lodged deep inside the president's ass, that has been the cause of his behavior all along.

5. Any autographed pictures taken by the robotic ass-camera must be worth millions, right? *check e-bay*

6. (insert head-up-ass joke here)

7. Cheney was president to begin with. He just wanted to have it on the record.

8. Where do you think we've been keeping those strategic oil reserves? Eh?

9. Oh my holy christ, it's the goatse guy. Let us never speak of this again.

10. The live camera feed from inside the president would be the most interesting report CNN has ever come up with. Fox News anchors will be tripping over themselves to compliment the president's ass.